Focus...

I can’t seem to find a point of focus for myself lately. I attempt to work on an assignment for a class or attempt readings in another and in the end accomplish nothing. I’m feeling as though I fail at every aspect of a course, at every aspect of this program; hell at every aspect of my life. No matter what I do I can not commit myself to anything. I sat down today to ready four chapters in a text book, I couldn’t even get through one before I found myself with my computer back in its home known as my lap. Everyone else seems to know what they are doing, where they are going, what they should be working on and how to go about getting it completed. I on the other hand, have accomplished nothing, completed nothing and am finding myself torn between work and school so vastly that I’m seriously considering dropping both and become a hobo. I could find myself a nice box to live in, write poems or blogs on the inside of it, using blood and feces as ink. An intriguing idea, though not in the least bit promising for a future career, I can keep myself focused on what I am writing now, why not what I have to do for my classes. I think my issue is that In order to be motivated I need a deadline for myself, I can never accomplish anything if I spread the work for it out over time, I simply need to sit myself down and complete something. I will do this tonight…Or right now. I shall got and read some of the chapters for one of the classes and feel as though I have accomplished something in life, even though I know our readings our useless as I have gotten through multiple class discussions or even debates on things I have not actually ready. Which reminds me I had to do some readings for my class that starts in 30 minutes… At last a focus; readings due now!